The Roope Family

California State Fair

2009-08-28T10:04:00.000-07:00

Saw this mechanical bull at the state fair this past weekend, and while I never had an interest in it before, I suddenly had the urge to try it. It was actually a lot of fun. After I saw this video, I realized it doesn't look at all as hard as it feels. It is much harder to stay on in reality, especially when it starts spinning. A guy before me fell off immediately 3 times. HaHa!

At the end, my hand was really starting to hurt and I thought I'd been on for long enough - much longer than I had expected to stay on - so when he started making it ride harder again, I stopped trying to hold on and let him buck me off to save my hand the pain. I kinda wanted to stay on some more, but I decided I better let go. I ended up with a jammed finger anyway, but it was worth it. :-D

(pst - Those of you who need a little help here - you know who you are - it's best to hit play, then hit pause and let the red line load all the way and then hit play again so the video doesn't keep stopping. Let it load, and then hit the square button on the bottom right, between the speaker and the triangle symbols, to view it full screen. And again, pause my music player above so it doesn't play over the video audio. Happy viewing.)

And here is Ben rocking out to one of the live bands playing there. At first I thought he was just dancing, and then Byron and I realized he was mimicking the guitar (when he looks like he's scratching his belly) and keyboard (when he's tapping on the ground). So cute.

Potty Mouth Mommy

2009-08-13T00:31:00.000-07:00

Tonight I heard Byron telling Ben, "Ben, there are words that Mommy uses that you can't use. Like half her vocabulary." .....(sheepish grin, shoulders shrugging)

Love

2009-07-20T13:17:00.000-07:00

Love is such a good feeling.

Sometimes it's giddy and exciting and exhilarating.

Sometimes it's calm and peaceful and joyful.

I love Byron and Ben. They make my life so full.

Ben Watch

2009-07-20T12:44:00.000-07:00

1) Ben is 2.5 and weighs about 33 lbs and is 36 inches tall.

2) Ben loves to say "No way." So glad he learned that...but of course it's to be expected...he is two.

3) Ben can count to 20 and say his ABCs.

4) Ben loves to copy his cousin, Maddie, by saying "It's very nice to meet you," and...when you say it back to him, "The pleasure's all mine."

5) Ben sings along to the songs on the radio...how does he even know all the words I don't know?

6) Ben can be a picky eater at times, and yet he will eat salad, green beans, broccoli, cucmbers, and carrots...so at least I'm getting some veggies into that boy. Fruit is easier, of course...he seems to love any and all fruit we give him.

7) Ben loves cars and trains and balls and climbing and all that typical boy stuff, but he also loves dancing, and is a major show off if you get him in the right mood.

8) Ben loves his books and just has to have his reading time at night before bed...which is very good.

9) Ben loves to visit his grandparents and aunts and uncles...which makes leaving him with a sitter so much easier these days.

10) Ben loves to play hide and seek, tickle monster, tag, basketball, and loves to cuddle with his mom and dad.

11) Ben and I switched roles last night, and he was the daddy and I was the baby. He really liked pretending to be the parent. I said to him, "Oh Daddy, you're such a good daddy," and he said "Oh baby, you're so cute!" LOL!! I love hearing him come up with new phrases or repeat things he's heard us say.

Photo Booth

2009-03-23T10:18:00.000-07:00

We went to Ian and April's wedding reception Saturday night and they had a photo booth with props for the guests to have a little fun with. What a fun idea. Here are our pics.

P.S. For those who are not real familiar with blogs, you can click on the pics to view them larger if you'd like.

I'm Thankful For:

2009-03-23T09:12:00.000-07:00

1) Having a husband who holds the priesthood, and that he was able to give our son a blessing last night when he fell and bashed his mouth on a corner. I'm glad it occurs to him to give him (or me) a blessing when we're really sick or hurt. I'm thankful for his faith in priesthood blessings.

2) Ben's injury not being worse. He is looking much better this morning. I hope his front tooth doesn't die and fall out - but we'll still love him if it does. :-) I think it's going to be okay though.

3) Byron loving me even when I'm stupid and lost.

4) Byron rolling over and spooning me in bed in the mornings (even if it is just to delay getting out of bed a few more minutes). It is so warm and cuddly and I love cuddling.

5) Byron working hard for our family.

Love this Dance

2009-03-18T12:48:00.000-07:00

I'm taking a hip hop class right now and LOVIN' IT! Anyway, so I've been on a sytycd kick too...can't wait for summer and the show to start again...and whenever we play one of the songs I've heard on sytycd in my class, it reminds me of the routine that was done to that song. On Monday they were playing Tambourine by Eve in class, so I had to look up the video with Hok and Jaime. Love this dance.

(Don't forget to turn off my music player before you
play any video on here, so the audio doesn't conflict.)

Oh, ya...love this one too. Love how the moves fit the music so well, and I really like the moves when they're sitting on the floor towards the front of the stage.

Ok, ok, as long as I'm on this kick, might as well put some more favs...

Ok I gotta stop...I could be here all day!

New Phrases

2009-03-11T15:48:00.000-07:00

Ben's language is really picking up. I hear him say new words literally everyday. It's fun. Yesterday I said, "Thank you Ben," and he said "you're welcome." Wow (heart melting). He says please and thank you all the time, but I'm sure that was the first time for you're welcome.

Here are a few new phrases he's picked up and likes to use often:

1) "Mmm num, my favorite." He says this about anything that sounds good to him at the moment. Ex. Peanut butter and jelly, mmm num, my favorite. Just insert some food at the beginning and you get the idea. It's really cute in his little voice.

2)"No, (insert food), gives me owie bum." This is the opposite of the one above and what he says when he doesn't want to eat something. It started one day when he told me that oranges give him owie bum - which they do - oranges, pineapple, anything very acidic really - and I was so surprised he had picked that up...but I've told him before that he can't eat oranges (when he sees others eating them) because they give him an owie bum, so I shouldn't be too surprised he picked that up. But now he uses that phrase for any food he doesn't want. And I'm just like, no Ben, that doesn't give you owie bum (eye's rolling). LOL.

3) "All day." This is something he tacks on to an activity he doesn't want to do, as if it's going to get him out of it or something. Examples: When I tell him I need to change his diaper, he says, "No mom, me change diaper all day." Or, when I tell him he needs to go to sleep, he says, "No mom, me go sleep all day." What?! Whatever. But it's funny.

4) "What?!" This is said often at random times. Usually in a high pitched voice, but sometimes it starts low and raises up to the high pitch, all drawn out like some wiseguy. And then if I repeat myself, he may say what again several times because he thinks it's just so funny. And so do we.

Monterey Trip

2009-02-05T09:21:00.000-08:00

(Click on video to start slideshow of pictures.)

Thursday, Jan 15, 2009, we drove down to Monterey California for the weekend for our anniversary. The 15th marked nine years. The drive was quicker than we expected and was really enjoyable having the time to just be together and talk. It was especially nice when we were on Hwy 1 and the drive was all curvy and lined with beautiful trees. When we got to our hotel we just admired the view from our ocean front room for a little while before retreating to our room. It was pretty cool to be able to hear the crashing waves all night. I love that sound.

Friday we slept in late and then took our sweet time getting showered and ready to go. Before going to breakfast we drove a little around town and down along the shore line, admiring the view and the homes that lined the coast – estimating how expensive those homes are and picking out our favorites. We finally made it to breakfast around 1pm. We ate at First Awakenings – apparently Rachael Ray ate there on one of her shows – and I can see why. It had very creative dishes that were very yummy and reasonably priced. After we ate, we strolled through the outlet shops near the restaurant and did some shopping before returning to our room. Later we went down to the beach in front of our hotel to play tag with the waves.

After we decided we were getting too cold (since it was dark out at the ocean in January), we freshened up and went back out to do some more shopping before dinner. Byron is a very patient man. I don’t know if I’ve ever met another man who actually seems to like shopping with his woman. He really acts like he’s enjoying watching me try everything on. And well maybe he is…especially the stuff from Victoria Secret…and really, can you blame him. Lol. ;-)

When we were ready to eat, we walked around Cannery Row to find some place that appealed to us, and ended up following the sound of a band to a place called Sly McFlys, where a live band was playing and people were enjoying themselves on the dance floor. Seemed like a fun place to eat, so we had dinner there, listened to the band, and people watched. They had really good coleslaw, and I’m not a huge coleslaw fan, but this was good stuff! And so was Byron’s clam chowder, which I never eat because I don’t like clam chowder, but dang! It was the best clam chowder I’ve ever tasted. After dinner, we crossed the street to a pizzeria that was having karaoke. There was a young crowd there, and we really enjoyed ourselves singing and watching others. It’s fun listening to karaoke when the people are actually talented. Also what was nice about these people was that they treated us like they knew us and were all very friendly. Around 1am we went back to our room. It was a good night.

Saturday we slept late again and then headed out to Fisherman’s Wharf. We walked down the Wharf and looked out at the view, held some very colorful birds, and had lunch at a quiet table overlooking the bay in an Italian seafood restaurant. After lunch we drove 17-mile drive and stopped to play on the beach and climb out on the rocks to watch the waves crashing up close. On the beach there were so many pieces of dead jellyfish. I don’t know if they can sting you when they’re dead, but I wasn’t taking any chances, so I stepped carefully around the sand as Byron teased me about it. When it got dark we went back to our room to rest for awhile before going back out to Cannery Row for dinner. I really really like Cannery Row. It’s one of my favorite parts of Monterey. There’s so much music and fun going on there, and the restaurants and shops are so full of life. After dinner, we went back to our room to freshen up and change to go out dancing. We tried out two dance clubs and then went back to the pizzeria for some karaoke and more dancing.

Sunday we enjoyed breakfast again at First Awakenings before heading out to the aquarium where we spent most of the day. I was absolutely mesmerized by the jellyfish, especially the light pink ones…which I found funny because jellyfish scare me, but when they’re put away safe in an aquarium tank, they are really quite beautiful and fun to look at. I also was completely captured by the outer bay tank which held the tuna, sharks, barracudas, sardines, and sunfish (among other things). And while all of the creatures were interesting to look at, the beauty of the school of sardines, with the light reflecting off of them as they moved, and the huge ugly sunfish held my attention for a lot longer than I would have expected – especially the sunfish. I don’t know if it was just how big or how ugly it was, but I couldn’t take my eyes off it any time it came into view. Once, it came right up to the glass where I was standing and slowly swam right by me with its large, bulging eyes staring back at me, and I was in awe of this big ugly fish God had created. LOL! For dinner we ate at another quiet table overlooking the water in another restaurant on the bay. We spent the rest of the night back in the little pizzeria singing karaoke again with the locals before returning to our room.

Monday, after we checked out, we went out to Mexican food for lunch and then just drove around the town and coastline some more, enjoying the sights before heading home. It was a nice trip. I would totally move to Monterey (if we could afford it – haha) and go run on the beach like everyday. Lol. Well it’s a good motivator to exercise. Running on the beach with music in your ear is exhilarating. Anyway, we sure lucked out with the weather that weekend. We couldn’t have asked for better weather. It was beautiful and sunny and in the 70s. Anyway, we’ll definitely have to make that trip again.

Imogen Heap

2009-02-05T00:40:00.000-08:00

So I just discovered Imogen Heap on youtube by accident and am now totally digging her. She has really great range, and I love how haunting some of her songs are. Some of you may know her already or heard her as part of Frou Frou. I heard her music has played on The O.C., which I've never seen, but read her music was in some finale episode or something.

Also her music has been on So You Think You Can Dance.

Season 2 had a group dance to her song "Hide and Seek."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ga5m3LzhBVM

- which Katee (of season 4) also did a solo to.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3lQk3UMqR8&feature=related

Season 3 did a group dance to her song "The Moment I said it."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1g9UTrS_S4&feature=related

I have put some of her songs here on the playlist on this blog, so you can check her out if you like.

Or her official website is http://www.imogenheap.co.uk/

p.s. Speaking of sytycd, I just love this little tribute to Courtney & Gev...especially Gev's awesome move at the very end of the video...I don't need to describe it, you'll know it when you see it. :-)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPwhEwZbT20&feature=related

There I Am

2009-01-10T06:58:00.000-08:00

I got lost.

It happens.

Trials, abandonment, betrayal, mistakes, sin, pain, overachieving, perfectionism, control, binging on something reckless; even everyday things like to-do lists and care-giving can do that to you. Somewhere my dreams, interests, goals, desires and sense of self-worth got lost. Always trying to be perfect for everyone - including myself. Failing miserably as it really is impossible. No time for self-care or self-worth. Even though sometimes I can be very selfish without even realizing it; still self-care gets the back burner, as it often does for women - moms especially. Who has time for it, right? Too many other things on that to-do list. And wouldn't doing something for myself just be more selfishness?

No.

No.

No more self-loathing. No more self-deprivation. It only eventually leads to binging. The lack of adrenaline, endorphins, joy, release, whatever just builds and builds and builds. And when you do finally get even a little bit of self-care, it's hard not to flip to the other extreme of the spectrum and say 'to hell with all the damn responsibilities and perfectionism' and just grab on to whatever it is that's making you feel alive and free again. Strange repressed feelings emerge. And the binging begins - leaving everyone else forgotten.

Neither extreme is healthy. Hyper control or out of control.

Where is the balance? Why is it so hard to learn and apply? Why am I not good enough in my own mind to schedule in self-care? We all know in our logical minds that you can't be good to others - a good spouse, a good parent, a good child, a good sibling, a good friend - if you don't take care of yourself. And how can you really be secure and safe enough to love any of them if you don't love yourself yet.

If I don't love myself yet.

Where did I go? Why haven't I learned in almost 3 decades how to love myself yet?

Always underestimating myself. Always wondering - what really do I have to offer besides housework and care-giving? There was more than that once, wasn't there?

Yes.

There was something. There were lots of things that were...ME.

But they got stripped away as I made mistakes I wouldn't forgive myself for. As others hurt me and I stopped thinking I was worth love. As I lost myself in work and perfection and subconsciously told myself that self-care wasn't noble enough to be on the to-do list.. But surely if I just kept trying to be perfect, I would be lovable right?

No.

Humans aren't perfect. We let ourselves down. We let others down. People make mistakes. It's going to happen til we die.

So maybe I'm learning by my own mistakes and sins that even when we screw up, it doesn't strip away all the good in us. It just means we fell down.

SO GET THE HELL UP!

I am still a good person. You are still a good person. We just fall down sometimes. But we're all God's children. And He's ALWAYS going to be waiting there for us to get back up. If I REALLY KNEW that - If I REALLY FELT that love He has for me, maybe I wouldn't be grasping so tightly to the approval of faulty humans. If I could see my own self worth, then maybe I could love myself. Concept. And maybe if I loved myself, I could finally know what it means to just live and be happy with myself, even when others aren't, or they withdraw their love, or make their own mistakes that hurt me. If I didn't depend on others approval so much, maybe my happiness wouldn't be dependent on it. Maybe I could still love myself because God does, and he is perfect in His judgment and love.

So I'm getting back up. Again. I'm not promising I won't fall again. That's always a lie. But right now - I'm getting up.

I forgive myself for being human. For bad habits, and mistakes, and sins. I will keep trying. Keep learning. Keep growing. Keep expanding my understanding. Line upon line.

But I need to learn balance.

No more maddening hyper-control. No more binging.

Balance.

That's the goal.

I won't be perfect at it. Baby steps.

So balance requires regular self-care. So who was I again? What do I like?

Hmmm.......

Learning. Research. School. Education. Church. Spiritual feeding.

Reading for pleasure.

Love stories and happy endings.

Travel - The excitement of airplane take-offs. The thrill of seeing some new place for the first time.

Water - Rain. Clear streams. Waterfalls. THE OCEAN - The ocean is magic.

Thunderstorms.

Anticipation. Need I say more here?

Hugs. Tight, all encompassing, embraces.

Kissing. The slow, tender, highly anticipated kind. Even better with the appropriate music playing in the background.

Ice skating - the feel and the smell of the ice; the sound of the blades; the speed; the spins; the thrill; the beauty.

Singing - in the shower; in my room; in my car; at karaoke.

Music. MUSIC. MUSIC!!!

DANCE. ALWAYS DANCE. FOREVER DANCE.

The emotion, the passion, the movement, the energy, everything. Dance is everything! It's my life-saver. When I'm sad I can dance it out to a sad song, or turn on something upbeat and free myself from the pain for the moment and maybe even longer. Dance is in my blood, in my bones, in my nerves; filling every part of me. Dance is life. So why did I let this one go? No more! No more! There will be a dance class this year. Maybe two. There will be dance...and anticipation...and love...and happiness.

And now...

THANK YOU.

Thank you Washington D.C. for giving me a taste of what it feels like to be just me for a short time. Thank you for reminding me I AM attractive. No more self-loathing for my post-baby body, because apparently I've still got it. LOL!

Thank you Twilight for reminding me how fun it is to read for pleasure, and that yes there is time if I make it...pst - balance here Julie. ;-) And also for reminding me what a powerful tool anticipation is.

Thank you Josh for reminding me during my binge on Twilight's overwhelming romance that the desire for that excitement of a new love, while powerful and overwhelming, is not as nice as being in a committed relationship and KNOWING someone and being known. Comfort and acceptance ARE good things. You are right.

Thank you Friend for the pain you caused, that slapped me in the face and taught me that I need to love myself. To not rely on yours or anyone else's human and insufficient love to fill me and help me love myself the way only God's love will. I know you weren't trying to cause me pain or even teach me that, but you did. Thank you.

Thank you 2008 for the lessons of pain and joy. I hope I won't forget. I hope I will be grateful.

Please God - forgive me - for everything. You know more than I do all that entails.

And let me feel Your love.

Let me forgive, and understand, and love myself and others while we're all here being human.

Ah Christmas...

2008-12-06T16:14:00.000-08:00

Yeah, it's Christmas time again.

HE PASSED!

2008-11-21T18:35:00.000-08:00

Byron I. Roope passed the
July 2008 California Bar Exam!

Yes!!!

Comfort

2008-11-13T23:47:00.000-08:00

Sometimes when the world is swirling around me and creating too much noise in my head, it's comforting to listen to music that brings the spirit near. I was on the Harr's blog and saw this picture (which yes I'm copying you Cookie, sorry) and wanted to have it up here too. The story of the army of Helaman is one of my favorite stories so when I saw this picture, I just wanted to have it too, and hear the primary song. "We'll Bring the World His Truth" was always one of my favorite primary songs as a child and still gives me goosebumps. I love this picture and this song.

ps - Ok obviously this pop version of the primary song is not the same as the children singing it, but the playlist website didn't have that version. Sorry if you don't care for this version. I still like this song anyway. :-)

This makes me so MAD!

2008-11-09T22:40:00.000-08:00

So I finally decided I know what my favorite cookies are. I loved these when I occasionally had them as a kid, and just bought a package the other day on sale and fell in love again! They are the Archway Oatmeal cookies with fruit inside - Apple Oatmeal, Date Oatmeal, (Fill in any fruit really) Oatmeal cookies. They are so soft and delicious! Here's a picture:

Okay so with it being Thanksgiving month, I thought it would be fun to post about how I'm thankful for these most wonderful cookies, but when I went online I saw that they have GONE OUT OF BUSINESS???!!! Ya, I had already heard about Mother's Cookies going under, but Archway too? Okay so they apparently are owned by the same company....But I am MAD now!

If I am freaking going to buy the best cookies in the world, and decide they are my favorite, they are not allowed to go out of business! Oh...what? The world does not revolve around me?! Darn it! Ahhhhh! Vent vent vent vent! Ahhhhh! Oh what is this world coming to? I know the economy is bad, blah, blah, blah, and we are all struggling to make ends meet. And I know once Byron's student loans come due we won't have any money left over each month to even afford to buy luxury items like cookies. And I know the unemployment rate is up, and the world is coming to an end, BUT THIS IS THE LAST STRAW!

Somebody better have a good substitute, and don't say those high end $5-$7 per tiny package brands either, because I can't afford them. You heard our student loans are coming due right? What do I look like Bill Gates? So if anyone out there has a substitute that is anywhere near as great as these little darlings are, I might try it - that is until we can't afford them anyway, starting like next month! Stupid student loans. Stupid cookie companies that go out of business.

I'm going to my room to cry. Wait I'm already in my room. Fine I'm going to go eat that package of Date Oatmeal cookies on my desk, and repent for my rantings, and thank God for this last package of the best cookies on earth that I'll never get to eat again! Ugh!

Have a nice day!

This Halloween

2008-11-02T22:10:00.000-08:00

Ben was sick on Halloween night, not that it mattered much, it was raining here anyway. But we did go to our church Halloween party the weekend before and took him trunk-or-treating. Ben was Batman. Byron and I just thought of something easy we could dress up as using the stuff we had in our Halloween box and some face paint so that we could hurry up and get to the party. I dressed up as a court jester and he as the Phantom of the Opera. We had a fun time and Ben loved playing all the games and running around. Here are some of the pictures we took that night.

Ready to go

Close up

Family Photo

Bean bag toss

Mommy & Ben racing for the donut
on a string - no hands allowed
(He absolutely loved this!)

Trunk-or-Treating

Last Halloween...

2008-10-25T08:27:00.000-07:00

Last Halloween we were listening to a "Who's Line is it Anyway" skit called "Unlikely Super-Heroes," while we were trying to decide what to be for Halloween. We were laughing at the skit and decided it would be fun to make our own unlikely super-heroes. So we did. We thought up what we wanted to be based on what we actually do in real life.

We were going to make Byron "The Litigator," since he works at Traffic Court for the DAs office. Then instead we decided we needed a villain and made him "Ambulance Chaser Man," even though that's not what he does, it's still a lawyer job - although I'm pretty sure that's not the technical name. :-p

Since I am a stay-at-home-mom, I was "The Domesticator," with my trusty weapons - a meat cleaver and swiffer duster, attached to my utility belt. We found this belt with sparkling red lips on the buckle and thought it was perfect, because of course every good wife should greet her husband with a kiss when he comes home from work. ;-D

And Ben (who is, of course, still in diapers) was "Capitan Poopy-Pants." (We put an extra diaper on the outside of the costume too, so he could be like other famous super-heroes who wear their underwear on the outside!)

We bought everything to make our costumes at the thrift store, so it wasn't too expensive. Here are a few pictures of our costumes.

click to enlarge

While we were at the thrift store last year, we found a 2T batman costume in good shape for only $2, so we got it for next year - now being this year - and that's what Ben is going to be. We can't have masks at the church Halloween trunk-or-treat party (which is better for safety anyway), so we're just going to paint a mask on him. I googled batman face painting and found some good pictures of bat-masks painted on, so we'll be attempting to do that - if he lets us!

We still don't know what we'll be this year, since we hadn't put much thought into it yet, and catwoman/batgirl/joker/robin costumes are so expensive. So we'll probably just paint our faces something generically simple like a skeleton, witch, vampire, whatever. I haven't decided yet. But whatever we do, we'll take some pictures to post on here later. For now, enjoy last year's pictures. :-)

Come so far...

2008-10-02T13:19:00.000-07:00

It's amazing that in just under 2 years a child can go from this

to this

We were planning on buying Ben a basketball hoop for Christmas, but because he decided to start climbing up on my bedside table and using the lampshade as a basketball hoop, we decided to get it early to prevent any falling accidents and save our lampshade. Here are some more pics of him with his new hoop.

(click to view larger)

Cute Moments

2008-10-02T12:18:00.000-07:00

1. Out of the mouth of babes: We say meal prayer before we eat each time, and last Sunday I was fasting so I only prepared Ben's breakfast and put it in front of him. Then, waiting for him to eat, I leaned against the counter and folded my arms (forgetting to pray 1st - just waiting in that position). That's when Ben saw my folded arms and folded his own arms and said "Prayer Mom." I was so proud! I said "Oh that's right Ben, we need to say prayer 1st. Thanks for reminding me." What a good kid!

2. Little Italian: Ben has been so much more affectionate lately. (I was worried that after I stopped breastfeeding, I would miss our cuddle/snuggle time. But Byron kept telling me Ben would still give me lovin'.) Well Byron was right and now Ben comes up to me a lot and gives me hugs or pats my face and says "mama mama." It sounds just like he's saying it with an Italian accent and it's so cute!

3. Maddie!!!: Ben loves his cousin Maddie. Whenever I'm looking at my sister's blog and he sees a picture of her, he yells "Maddie!" in excitement. He also thinks little girls with blonde hair in his books are her and calls them Maddie also. Well up until a couple days ago, I couldn't get him to eat the cereal Kix, that I had bought for him. So a couple days ago I just got the box down and started eating it in front of him, but didn't offer him any because a) I know he doesn't eat it and b) I thought if I didn't push it on him and just let him see me enjoying it, he might ask for some. Well he was watching me eat them, so I casually just said in between handfuls, "Mmm...this cereal is good. Maddie likes to eat this cereal too." So then of course he asked for some, and now I can't get him to stop asking for it. He even said yesterday while he was eating the Kix, "Maddie Kix," and I said, "Yep Maddie likes Kix too." So thanks Maddie for being so important to Ben and for being my leverage to get him to eat a healthy cereal! :-)

Here are some pics of those two together:

Precious

2008-09-27T12:33:00.000-07:00

I was getting ready to post some new videos of Ben with his new basketball hoop (to follow soon), but was looking over a bunch of his older videos too and this one was the 1st one we ever took with our camera. (Byron's mom bought us our camera and gave it to us when Ben was born.) We were just learning how to use it when we took this video so we didn't know the sound wasn't turned on yet, so there's no audio, but the video is still precious even so. This was the day after Ben was born (I believe) and daddy was getting to know his new son. Had to post it. Just so precious.

Updates and Past Videos

2008-08-23T15:02:00.000-07:00

I needed to get some updated pics from our recent trips/outings on here, and while going through our media folder I saw a bunch of videos that I had been meaning to get up on youtube (pre-blog) that I never got around to uploading. So since I don't have to do any converting of my videos to another format for this blog (like I had to do for youtube) I'm going to add some of the cute ones from the past year to this post.

Updates 1st:

Holy Cow!
This cow at cousin Noah's 1st Bday party scared the pants off Ben. It was so funny though because he kept pointing to the cow (which is like his favorite animal) and making cow noises, but if it
even started to approach us he'd burst into tears!

Ingram Family Reunion 2008
Ashland Oregon Shakespeare Festival
Here are some of the family pictures we got together
at our family reunion in Ashland this year.

Just the 3 of us

All the guys

All the girls

Our Little Fish!

Ben loves the floaty-rings. He puts his
arms around them and takes off.
It really surprised me and Byron how brave he was.

Past Videos:

Bounceopolis
My sister Joanie, my mom, and I took the kids to
an indoor bounce-playground last Nov (2007).

Chicken Run!
This was this past Easter at my parents house. Ben has
such a cute laugh when he's going after the chicken!

Little Music Lover
Ben loves music - listening to it, playing it, dancing to it.

Rocking Out

Budding Musician

Lord of the Dance

I love my Ben!

2008-08-22T23:22:00.000-07:00

I love my Benjamin sooooo much! I have a lot to blog about, but I don't really have time yet to get everything posted that I want to. So for now I just wanted to share this adorable picture and say that I love my Ben!

A Way to a Dad's Heart

2008-08-19T22:22:00.000-07:00

Hello blogging world! Its Byron. Yes, the blog caught me too. Its a disease, but oh how we love it.

Anyway, as you may have read we have been trying to get Ben to go to sleep on his own, so that Julie and I can sleep through the night again. Novel idea, huh. Last night I was getting him ready for bed and he was pointing at his crib asking for Tigger and his Kitty stuffed animal. I asked him if he wanted to go to bed and have me sing to him and he said yes, which I found a bit odd, but relieving. Julie was out in the front room doing dishes, or saving the world from something as usual. When she came back in she started to sing to him after I had stopped and he started to cry. Crying, not so unusual. What came next was the unusual part. Ben stopped crying and asked for me to sing to him, not Julie. After confirming that he was a) not hallucinating and b) still awake I proceeded to sing to him while he fell asleep.

Times like that are not fair for a Dad. You try to be all manly, but then your kid does something totally unexpected and melts your heart. What a joy children are.

I'd write more, but I need to go cut some wood, or build something, or eat raw meat. Yeah, thats it.

Night and Day

2008-08-13T23:16:00.000-07:00

Okay so the first night I put Ben down to sleep without nursing was much easier than that first nap. He cried for about 10 minutes and then I remembered my mom sang him primary songs when he spent the night at her house - so I thought I'd try that and it worked. I told him I'd sing to him but he'd have to lay down first. I sang primary songs and lullabies for about 30 minutes and he went to sleep without crying. He woke up at 4am and cried a little for me to come get him, but then I asked him if he wanted me to sing and he said yes and laid himself back down. About 10 minutes later he was asleep. At 5am same thing, and he slept until 7:15am. Good boy.

Nap day 2: Instead of crying today he thought it was some kind of game to see how many times he could get mom up to lay him back down - smiling and laughing when I'd do it. So I finally stopped getting up and told him I was going to sleep. He played around in his crib for a while, but then I fell asleep and when I woke up about 20 minutes later he was finally asleep.

Bedtime day 2: I put him in his crib and he started to fuss and want me to hold him, but I said he needed to lay down if he wanted me to sing to him. About 20-30 minutes of singing and he was out without a peep. Byron and I were very surprised.

Nap day 3 (today): I hate nap time - it's too light even with the shades pulled tight. Crying, screaming, and begging for an hour, even with singing to him! Finally I just stood by his crib so he would stay laying down and sang to him with my eyes shut. After a few songs, I opened my eyes and he had his eyes closed and was falling asleep. A few more minutes and he was out, but he only slept around 30-40 minutes instead of his usual 1.5 - 2 hours. Grrr. I swear, by the time I get him down to sleep, I need a nap!

Bedtime day 3: We do the bedtime routine again: Diaper change, pjs, brush teeth, books, and into the crib. Started to fuss, but when I asked him if he wanted me to sing to him, he said yes and laid down. Again 20 - 30 minutes of singing and he was out. Night time is spoiling me.

I wonder how long until nap time gets easier.....it does get easier....right???

"Cry-it-Out" - Oh how I hate thee

2008-08-11T15:04:00.000-07:00

There is the dichotomy of opinion on sleep styles - "attachment parenting" with extended nursing and co-sleeping, and "cry-it-out" in their own bed. I never knew there was a side to take really when I first became a parent, but I naturally fell into attachment parenting (without even realizing it until reading up on it later) because it was so much easier, and cuddly, and nurturing to nurse to sleep and co-sleep together.

All my sisters have done cry-it-out, which has worked for them, and that's good. Well attachment works for me too most of the time...aside from the crowded bed with repeated night waking/feedings or especially the rude comments from others (when you're still nursing past the 1st year) who should realize that there isn't a one-size-fits-all parent or child and they should let others chose to parent the way they like. Honestly, extended nursing is so healthy and so accepted around the world, except here in this country where breasts are sex-objects and should be returned to that purpose as soon as possible - "get that child weaned!" we yell as if we're so afraid that this nurturing experience is going to somehow permanently damage this child and leave him weak and dependent all his life, or worse - rob us of a convenient sex life! Oh please! Read a little academic research people! And the funny thing - that's not even from Byron! He doesn't bother me about it - it's others - strange since I'm not sleeping with them! Anyway, if I don't give you a hard time about weaning your child before a year old, or not nursing at all - which I think is totally up to the mother and her desire or situation - then why is everyone so obnoxiously opinionated about my extended nursing?

Personally I have actually really enjoyed nursing and co-sleeping, but that said, there are days or moments when I'm so tired from not sleeping well enough, or I just don't feel like nursing at the moment, that I'm finally ready to wean - and yet even the thought of weaning feels so lonely. In my head I know he's getting older, and I'll have more babies to nurse down the line, and it's not going to leave him with abandonment issues all his life to let him cry-it-out, etc., etc., but the process of getting him weaned is so so sad.

But it's time to get some sleep. (Gosh I can hear the applause from those who other's nursing seems to bother so much.) And even more pressing than that (because co-sleeping, as crowded as it can be, is still so sweet and cuddly), is the fact that he needs to be able to go to sleep on his own now so others can get him to sleep when they're babysitting him, and not have him as a crying mess! THAT has gone on long enough. And since he was just having to go to sleep on his own most of last week while at the babysitter's in Ashland (while we were at the plays), I figure we might as well keep the ball rolling and put him to sleep without nursing. I'll probably still nurse a couple times a day at first just so that my milk can gradually decrease. As hot as size D breasts might be, they're really no fun when they're full of milk, leaking on your clothes, and painfully hard as rocks! But 1st, we're learning to go to sleep without nursing - which brings me (after that long soap-box intro) to the topic 0f this post -- cry-it-out.

Today - Day 1 - I played with Ben, nursed and cuddled him a bit, then read him a book, and then came heartbreaking hell. At 1:35pm I put him in his crib and told him to lay down. Because he can now climb out of his crib, I cannot just leave the room to let him scream himself into oblivion. So I pretended to nap too on my bed just next to him. He screamed for 10 minutes and tried to climb out - we played mom get up and lay him back down a couple times, then 1:45pm Ben stopped crying and laid down. "Is this going to be that easy?" I think to myself. He plays around a bit, putting his legs up on the side of the crib slats and back down again. That lasts for 5 mins; 1:50pm back to crying, then screaming, then the more heartbreakingly calm "mama, mama, mama," as if to say, "Ok, I'm being good and asking nicely like you taught me too, can I get out now?" That was way harder to ignore than the screaming! But I toughed it out. Once I told him that I was proud of him for asking nicely, but that it was still nap time and he needed to sleep so his body would feel better, and then I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep again.

At 2:05pm he was still crying/screaming and had snot and drool all over, so I got a tissue to clean up his face (without picking him up) and laid him back down again - which of course he promptly got back up and went back to alternating between crying and that brutally sweet calling for mama. I got up again a few minutes later to wipe his face and he promptly laid back down before I got to him. I thought at first he didn't want his nose wiped, but then he didn't fight me wiping his face off, and it occurred to me that maybe he was getting it - that I was serious about him laying down and was just complying. Back to my bed I went. He stood up again and fussed to be let out - reaching with those little arms and sad face begging to have mommy hold him. I can see how any parent would have a hard time not giving in to that. Crrraaaccck! Another little break in my heart. :-( I force myself to close my eyes and not look at it.

At 2:15pm I thought I'd try getting up to lay him down again to see if he'd lay down on his own. He did, and I told him to close his eyes so his body can sleep. I laid back down and at 2:17pm I opened my eyes to see if his eyes were closed. They were, and he was drifting off...with the little, sad, crying, sniffle in his sleep. Ten minutes later he was still sniffling, but less frequently. Convinced he's asleep, I made my break to the restroom. When I came back he was still asleep, still sniffling, but still asleep. Success I guess - and in less than an hour - much shorter than I had mentally prepped for. All in all sleep has been achieved, but so has the breaking of my heart.

Oh "cry-it-out" you may work, but I hate you - just so you know.

Renning Family Reunion 2008 - Las Vegas, NV

2008-08-04T09:19:00.000-07:00

This past weekend we were in Las Vegas for our Renning Family Reunion. (Renning is my paternal grandmother's side of the family.) We have this reunion every other summer, and usually have a lot of family show up - sometimes around 100 people. This year was a little smaller - I think we counted around 40 people, but it was still great to see everyone who could come this year.

One thing I learned is that vacations with a toddler can be challenging! This is not just for selfish reasons - like "bummer we can't go on any of the thrill rides with a toddler in tow," or "oh ya, we need to stop playing for a few hours so my child can have his nap," but also just because long, hot days and a runny nose can make for a very cranky child. So either 1) bring a babysitter so at bedtime you can put your precious one down for the night while you hit the rides, or 2) save those attractions for another time when just the two of you are on vacation with your little one at home with grandma for the weekend or something.

Nevertheless, even with Ben's meltdowns, we still found plenty to do to keep us all entertained. With this reunion being in Vegas, there were so many attractions/shows/exhibits (and I'm not referring to the naked kind), that lots of smaller groups broke off a lot to do their own thing, but we did still have quite a few times where the whole family met together for food, fun, and visiting. Here's what our little family did:

Friday: After checking in to the hotel, we went up to the family conference room (attached to Patti's room) and had lunch with most of the family that was there. Then Byron (who was pretty tired from the bar exam last week and getting up early for the flight) went to our room to take a nap, while I took Ben for a dip in the pool. We got to swim with Lenny, Ryan, Grandma Brown, Denise, Sam, and Patti. After swimming we got dressed and visited with most of the family at the free happy hour at the hotel, where we had free drinks (yes soda for us) and free snacks (popcorn, nachos, pretzel mix), until the pizza arrived for dinner back in Patti's room. Next Byron, Ben, and I went with my dad to see the fountains at the Bellagio - which I must say is an exquisite hotel (inside and out) and the fountain show was really fun to watch. Afterwards we walked over to see the Paris hotel, but by the time we got there, Ben had had enough stimulation for one day and was showing signs of meltdown. So Dad got picked up by his cousins to go hangout, while Byron and I took our exhausted child back to the hotel and went to bed.

Saturday: I thought breakfast was really nice. Not only does this hotel (The Embassy Suites - on Paradise Rd) have complimentary drinks and snacks at happy hour, they have a huge complimentary breakfast with made-to-order omelets, cold cereal, fresh fruit, pastries, pancakes, french toast, waffles, country potatoes, bacon, sausage, milk, juice, and more. Yummy. Breakfast was another time to visit with family - at least until Ben was done and decided to scream because I wouldn't let him run around, at which time I had to take him back to the room to finish getting ready for the day. When we were all ready to go, the three of us went with Dad to the Dolphin Habitat/Tiger Exhibit at the Mirage. We met up with another small group of our family there for a little while. Here are a few pics:

Byron, Ben, Judie, Shauna & Ethan

(click to see larger)

After we finished with the exhibit, Ben was having another meltdown - so instead of going out to lunch as planned, we just put him in the car seat, drove around until he fell asleep, then went through a drive-thru and ate lunch in the car. Gotta be flexible. After he woke up from his nap, we fed him then toured the Venetian.

Next we went back to the hotel to get our swim suits for the family picnic at the park/pool, at which time Ben decided to play "secretary" with the room phone and the pen and paper he found on the night stand. So I had to snap a picture of it. So cute!

When we got to the park, the pool was unexpectedly closed early, but I stayed in my swim suit to try to get some color on my pasty-white legs, which even without sunscreen for the 1st hour, still just freckled a little and stayed white. Bummer - guess I'll have to try the sunless gradual tanner and pray not to turn orange. :-D

Ben liked "feeding" the ducks and geese at the pond - which really just consisted of him throwing dirt, tiny pebbles, and dried grass at them until they got fed up and left! LOL! So he switched to chasing the pigeons!
When we were done with the birds, it was time to eat; and after dinner Ben and Ethan ran around and dug in the patches of dirt while we chased after them, took pictures of the family, visited, and enjoyed the live music some of the family members were playing for us.
I heard their was some dancing later on, but we left a little early because of course - you guessed it - Ben was having another meltdown. (Do you see a pattern - fun, fun, fun, meltdown, fun, fun, fun, meltdown....)

When we got back to the hotel, we were pretty hot and Ben had calmed down, so the three of us went swimming in the hotel pool - which Ben LOVED! (Everytime we got off the elevator this weekend, he ran straight for the pool.) So we had fun swimming and relaxing, and then went up to our room to shower and get dressed. Hungry again after the pool, we wanted to get something to eat, but we didn't want to have to drag Ben out again, so we just ordered room service, and then put Ben to bed.

Sunday: Yummy breakfast again, and then we had our family meeting where Grandma Brown told us some stories from our family history. We also discussed the date and place for the next reunion, and added suggestions for things we wanted to start doing again at reunions that have been done in the past (like a family talent show for the kids, and let's be honest the adults too!). After the family business meeting, we took pictures of each generation, said our goodbyes and checked out. It was great to see everyone, and we'll see you next time!

Other pics and videos: Ben loved the elevator. He kept wanting to push the button himself, and when it would open he would say, "I did it!" He also loved the fountain in the lobby. It was pretty neat-O. I took a video to show what it did.

P.S. - We flew to Vegas and Ben did much better than expected on the airplane. The week before I got him a book called "Airport" by Byron Barton from the library and read it to him several times. I told him how exciting it was going to be to go on a plane, and when we were on the airplane I just made really excited faces when we took off and landed. I did have to read him books the whole flight though to keep him entertained so he wouldn't get bored and yell that he wanted to get down. Overall, though, he was very good in the airport and on the plane. Yeah Ben!

THE BAR IS OVER

2008-07-31T18:15:00.000-07:00

Byron just finished the bar exam about an hour ago. Yeah!!!! Now we get to see each other again at a reasonable hour. He will be working as a law clerk at traffic court while we wait to see if he passed. Results come out in November. A long time, I know. But I don't even care right now that it's that far away, because right now the bar is over! Time for a little fun and celebration!

Random Memory 2

2008-07-30T22:36:00.000-07:00

Funny how reading other's blog stories makes you remember your own funny moments from times past. Rebecca had a really funny cake story that I kept giggling about, so I had to comment on her post and tell her my funny cake story. And I thought - what the hay - I'll post it here too. (Although I think hers takes the cake!)

My cake learning experience:
Once when I was maybe 11 or 12ish my next 2 younger sisters and I made a surprise bday cake for our younger sister, and it was awful! We made a yellow cake and didn't know you had to let it cool a bit b4 trying to take it out, and when we tried to get it out of the pan it just crumbled. So panicked, we put all the pieces back in the pan and tried to spread a thick smooth layer of frosting over it so it would look normal. Well at the party when we went to cut the cake, we just gave each other these hopeless glances and then admitted it might be hard to serve, but it would still taste good! It just looked like this big, yellow, crumbly cake mess with too much frosting, and I remember thinking it looked like scrambled eggs - so I have always referred to it as the scrambled egg cake. Oh well, you live, you learn.

Random Memory

2008-07-26T15:26:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I was just reading my friend Heather's Blog, and she was talking about how her husband does funny things in his sleep - like sleep walking, talking, and staring at her when she's asleep, but he can't remember doing any of it...(you can go read about it under the Jordan Family link). Anyway, this reminded me of a funny memory I have of Byron doing weird things in his sleep - mostly just saying weird things - like thinking I was his mom trying to wake him up when we 1st got married. So the story is:

One time when we were living in Logan UT, I woke up because Byron pulled my pillow out from under my head, and when I looked up he was standing above me holding the pillow up. My eyes got real big and I remember thinking, "What are you going to do with that?!" He then slammed it down on his side of the bed and laid down on it. I asked him why he stole my pillow and he told me that he didn't and he just needed to get a chair for his dad. I (playing along) asked him where he and his dad were, and he responded that "duh, we're at our work meeting, and he needs a chair - now be quiet!" (Byron and I used to both deliver for Pizza Hut.) So I said to him, "Byron, your dad doesn't work with us, and we're not at a work meeting right now, so can I have my pillow back please?" He kinda grumbled something and I took my pillow back, and it was quiet again. I laid there trying to go back to sleep, but started laughing at the whole ordeal, only to have Byron 1/2 wake up and sharply say, "What are you laughing at? You're keeping me up!"
I'm keeping YOU up? Oh that really got me laughing! Still - kinda creepy though! He didn't remember any of it the next morning - or so he says...dun dun dunnnn!!!!

I find it funny that my usually good-natured, doting husband can be so crabby in his sleep - but then again I guess I have the same problem. I'm notorious for saying mean things in my sleep that I can't remember the next day - or why I would say them.

Hmmm...I wonder if this means Byron gets to post a weird story about me now......

Copy Cat

2008-07-26T12:29:00.000-07:00

So today I was vacuuming and Ben wanted to help vacuum (like I let him do sometimes since he thinks he's such a big boy when he helps), but I was in a hurry and kept asking him to please move. He eventually walked off, but soon came back with his push car (you know the little ones you get them when they're learning to walk to push along, or they can also sit and ride on it - pushing and steering themselves along - you know the ones I'm talking about?). Anyway, it of course does not resemble a vacuum cleaner, but you can push it like one, which is what he did. My little copy cat watched and copied my every move. I would move the chair and vacuum under it, he would move the chair next to mine and "vacuum" under it. I held down the rug by the back door so it wouldn't move when I vacuumed over it, then he did the same with his push car, and so on until I was done vacuuming. I couldn't help smiling and chuckling as we went along.

Also, the other day I was clipping and filing my nails on the bed while watching "So You Think You Can Dance," and as I would clip a nail off, I would put it in a little pile on a book to go throw away easily when I finished. Well Ben kept trying to get in my pile, which I wasn't too keen on, so I gave him another little nail file from the pack and he proceeded to watch closely to what I was doing - each little step - and try to mimic it. I would put a nail piece in the pile, he would watch and then pretend to pick something off his little nail and put it in the pile too. I would file my nail, he would file his nail. It was very cute.

What is it they say? Imitation is the highest form of flattery? Well little copy cat, thanks for the flattery I guess. On the other hand, I really need to remember what I say and do around him, and be the best example I can be for my little copy cat. Although I'm sure the embarrassing moments are coming - of when your child copies something you shouldn't have done (especially in front of them), and they decide to display their knowledge of this new word or behavior in front of your friends, or worse, your church leaders! Right Mikey?! Oh I'm sure it's coming, because it most likely happens to even the very best parents, of which I've yet to hit that mark, so I know it's coming! :-D

Well, too bad I didn't have a picture or video of those 2 stories above, but my little Ben is the cutest thing, and it is thrilling to watch a little person learn new things. Which by the way, he is doing a full somersault all by himself now, and that got all kinds of clapping and cheers from mom and dad! Yeah Ben!!!

Ok, so I found a picture of the push car I was talking about.
Here's Ben at 10 months on his push car - that now doubles as a vacuum cleaner!

Here's Ben at 11 months actually vacuuming at grandma's house.

He really likes to help, and was so proud of himself!

TURN DOWN VOLUME BEFORE PLAYING!
Here's Ben at 16 months vacuuming at home.
Daddy came home and we didn't even hear it over the vacuum cleaner.

TaDa! Ben's magnificent somersault!
(19 months old)

Fine I'm blogging - Are you happy now?

2008-07-21T16:39:00.000-07:00

OK, so for all of you out there who've been telling me to get a blog - I did it - just now as a last minute thought before starting dinner. But I have to go make dinner now, and since I don't really know when I'll have much time to work on this thing (until we move into our own place) I'm not promising anything spectacular. But I'll try to get some pictures and updates on here for you, my wonderful family and friends, when I get the chance. :-)
~Julie~